Excuses

It is unusual for me to not volunteer to take care of things. As many things as I can for as many people. Lately, though, I've not been able to do as much due to the aforementioned series of sinus infections (my sinuses still ain't right, but that's another post for another time). I am finding that this results in dirty looks from people, as though I'm not doing enough, or pushy emails about why I've not completed things more quickly. I am but one person. I can only manage so much.

This brings me to an issue a friend pointed out on facebook. Why is it that parents get so much leeway for leaving early, not showing up, being generally unreliable, when folks like me, who try their best but have a disease that gets in the way, often wind up holding the bag? I understand that parenting is difficult, but so is living with a chronic illness. I do not whine about it. In fact, if you know about how I'm feeling in a given day, feel lucky because I do not share that information freely (except here, but... not everyone reads this, so I digress) for fear that people will not see me as normal.

I never use PIDD as an excuse to get out of something. If I say I can't, it isn't because I just don't want to, although I guess feeling so crappy you don't want to do something could qualify in that case, but I won't count it. Other people are able to make me feel SO GUILTY when I'm taking their time away from their precious babies (they grow up so fast, you know?) because I can't manage to add some additional task to my plate. It isn't fair to me. If your kids are going to be your primary priority, say so from the outset and don't volunteer to help just to be on the list. Don't push your work on me because you can't actually do what you've said because, odds are, I am working hard to meet my own commitments.